Tales to Admonish! #4

Seriously, Buck Rogers, you have to ask the green-skinned cyborg alien with hypno-eyes and an enormous pimple-covered cranium why he was using an unidentified ‘ray machine’ on his ‘prisoner’?  If he’s got a prisoner, he’s probably not one of the white hats to begin with.

JUST SHOOT HIM IN THE FACE WITH YOUR DISINTEGRATOR PISTOL.  That’s why Star Command gave it to you.

This isn’t Star Trek, where you have to make nice with the space bugs, understand their strange native culture, and engineer a non-hostile diplomatic solution that’s win-win for everyone.

SHOOT.  HIM.  NOW.

And dammit, stop looking him directly IN THE SWIRLING PUPILS!

Okay, then . . . well, don’t blame me when you wake up an amnesiac in a metal bikini chained to a Hutt.

SUPERHEROINE FASHION TIP #365:  Going braless in a halter top and wearing Impenetrable Mystical Chain Mail Panties of Chastity +5 sends mixed messages to everyone, friend and foe alike.

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